Parenting Seminar

Was at a Parenting Seminar late this afternoon, and must admit that though I had to close my eyes in order for my ears to concentrate on the monotonous presentation, it was a session that was enriching for the very fact that I could see that there are men who are very interested in the "study" or "field" of father parenting. There were men, young and old, some obviously with years of battle experience behind them and others like me, looking forward eagerly to the day when we too, will be called to fight the age old battle of "catch me if you can" or when they get older, "stop me if you can".
Another learning point I took out of the session was this wise quote by Mr So MeBo Dy, 'The world would be a different place if the decisions were taken by men who had been close to their children'.
Brings to mind the writer (can't remember his name too) who wrote 'Seven Seasons of a Man in the Mirror'. He wrote that many a times, men end up giving too much of their time to those who don't appreciate their time and give too little time to those who really need them.
So true, how we put priority to proposals, to customer meetings, to enhancement requests, only to find later that 'hey! why do I not understand my wife? why do my parents not understand me? what happened to the seemingly endless banter and jokes I had with my close friends? or whao, kids nowadays grow up really fast!'
In a very real sense, its the society that we grew up in, the age of the internet, everything is expected to be completed yesterday, everyone expects an answer before they have even asked the question, no longer are we able to say, 'Ok, give me sometime on that, will revert to you in 3 days time'. First we have to tell them ALL that we have on our plate, then get their approval for the delay. Not true though in some countries where it is an accepted norm to put family first, with right priorities. Or perhaps, sometimes, it is because we just don't have the courage to set our priorities right.
I have found that when I do state legitimate family 'excuses' like, 'I need to bring my wife to the gynae' or 'I have no time this weekend because I'm bringing my parents out', colleagues and customers are usually very understanding (with some exceptions of cos) and even seem to rethink about their own priorities.
So make a stand today! Give your time to those who really need you!

One last note on my relationship with my wife. I hope the last posts didn't put the idea that ours is a romantic Hollywood love relationship in you. Cos it certainly is not. We HAD to make the effort to understand each other, we HAD to make the effort to CHANGE for each other, we HAD to make the effort to KNOW and GIVE IN, not only to each other, but to our extended family as well.
We just reminded each other over dinner just now how hard the 1st three years were for us. (Examples to be given in later posts). But the gist of it is that we really HAD to put in the effort to make it work. If we had held on to Hollywood beliefs of 'You must love me for who I am!' or ' Love is an emotion... Sometimes I feel like I love you, sometimes I don't', then I'm sure this blog would have been called 'Diary of a Lonely Man' instead. Love is a choice for us, we chose to love each other, even though many a times the other party seem really really very unlovable. Love is a choice, not just a feeling.
1 John 4:19 'We love because He first loved us'.